I will be writing a 'proper' post about the Tots100 Christmas Party at Butlins, Bognor Regis in full over the next couple of days. But in the meantime I'm going to cut to the chase and give you the juicy bits that I know you are gagging to find out...I look after you I really do...Firstly some photos, now there are some EVIL ones of me in circulation and so I feel no remorse in posting these ones... [slideshow]
Firstly I have come to the conclusion that Sally Whittle is not as scary as I thought she might be and is in fact a lovely person and when you look at what she does, offers bloggers and how much time and effort she puts in to what she does you can only come away with super respect. I am not kissing arse I just happen to have a bit of a lady crush on her.
The day of the Tots100 Xmas Party started with the sad news that my sleeping buddy and blog-star Baby Baby couldn't come to the event as she had a poorly child. This was uber-sad as she'd really been super excited about it. And then at quite literally the final hour Actually Mummy stepped in to fill the space. Now I think she was just desperate to see me in my jim-jams -but don't tell her I said that.
There was fun and merriment mid afternoon. Let's just say it involved hyping a load of bloggers up on coffee and then setting them up in what I can only describe as a Festive Battle Royale affair. Despite dressing a toy dog up as an angel and blatant attempts at bribery the A Team (the team I was on) was robbed by some cranberry threading deviants. I got to meet some super folk who I have read so much that I felt like I knew them already who included Dear Beautiful Boy, WitWitWoo and DaddaCool. There were also some familiar faces in the beautiful forms of GeekMummy, Mum In The Mad House and Mummy..Mummy..Mum!
Next up Actually Mummy announced she needed to de-fur her Yeti legs and having DRUNK MY GIN she proceeded to FILL THE BATH WITH LEG HAIR. At least I hope that was leg hair...
Dinner was a yum fest and I ended up sitting by my new lady crush, I hoped that I could zap some of her powers over to my noggins but I fear the extra cocktail that TiredMummyofTwo had given me muffed that up.
Then I screamed at The Boy and Me in the toilets in shock.
After the meal a small splinter cell of the 'hardcore' went off to the late night pub/music venue. Actually Mummy was on fire, dancing like a woman possessed and I stand by my comment 'She has a C battery shoved up her arse'. It was a surreal time that followed with some very random people around us - think of David Lynch's Twin Peaks and you are halfway there. Do you recall the bit in the film 'The Shining' where the two little girls are stood in the hallway? Well I walked back from having a pee only to be faced with a gangway with no one but a dwarf dressed as a Hells Angel, hands on hips staring at me. I did check with the others and they saw him too - it wasn't just in my mind.
SnuggleBubby, Tired Mummy of Two and myself were 'escorted' from the stage for dancing. This was by Kirk, security, who soon became a favourite with us as the Butlins pin-up boy. Everyone thought he was rather fit, as we did Romanian Mums husband who looks like a young Bruce Willis.
New Mum Online was in the zone, dancing away, visiting Kirk to
check his hot bod out to find out why were weren't allowed to dance on the stage. Here Come The Girls was lovely and very funny but had a fancy looking camera and I fear may have many scary photographs in her possession now! Romanian Mum also busted some moves and had me in stitches and took the news that we all thought her husband was buff very well indeed. SnuggleBubby was an unstoppable dance machine and Actually Mummy could not resist the lure of Twitter and at one point I suspect that she was passing on images of the evening to that monkey Typecast who no doubt was goading her to do so.
Tired Mummy Of Two is funny and friendly but managed get me talking to some rather odd men at the bar who's opening line was 'If you were and Air Marshall where would you keep your gun?' and followed that gem through with 'This is the box - and this me outside it'. Then he started talking about terrorism and Al Quaeda and Tired Mummy Of Two inferred to them that they were paedophiles before plying me with more vodka and coke.
At this point we took pity on a lone man at the bar and invited him to join us all. All we know is he was Paul. Not long after we left, he accompanied Actually Mummy and I back to our hotel in what we thought was an act of chivalry. Turned out that thought a piece of romantic action was on the cards with at least one of us and at that point we said goodnight and legged it.
And there ends a very fun evening... these are of course the 'odd' bits. I have many good, interesting things to say about the Party itself, Butlins and Kia which shall follow in the next day or two...